I'm so in love. This has been the best month and a half of my life. Also the worst.

Why you ask?

On Friday, February 27th, I drove to Missouri to see William. It was a long, long drive and I had to go through St. Louis which was the scariest thing I have ever done in my life. I hate driving anyway, but driving in big cities scares the bejeezus out of me. I managed it though and I didn't get lost, not one time. After five hours and 300 some miles, I finally arrived in St. Robert's, Missouri, just outside of Fort Leonard Wood. I checked into my hotel, relaxed for a little while, and then took a shower. Two hours later, I went and picked William up on base (not before attacking him and giving him the biggest hug and the biggest sloppiest wettest kiss ever) at the PX (post exchange) and we proceeded to Crakcer Bararrel because we were both starving. After we ate, we went to wal-mart to get some things and then it was off to the hotel which we left only one time until we checked out on Sunday morning. I will not go into the details of everything we did that weekend, but it was the most amazing weekend of my life....

And at the end of it...he proposed!!! That's right my friends. I am engaged as of March 1, 2009!

I love my boyfriend. I will get through this. I love my boyfriend. I will get through this. I love my boyfriend. I will get through this.

I keep telling myself that. Maybe I'll start believing it soon. *tears*

We found out where his permanent duty station is today... Barksdale Air Force Base, Louisiana. *sigh* I know it could be sooo much worse. He could be stationed overseas. He could be deployed. He could be in Alaska or Hawaii. But it doesn't stop me from being upset. Everyone tells me how lucky I am.

I'd like to tell those people to kindly go fuck themselves.

I don't give a shit how short the distance is. I don't fucking care if he's *only* a few states away. Everyone says, "Oh, twelve hours is nothing. At least he's not in Iraq." Does it really matter how near or far away he is? Does it really matter, when he's not here with me? Distance is distance, no matter how far it is. I don't care if he's 5 minutes away in the next quad over or if he's halfway around on the other side of the world. I still miss him like hell and I was still hoping he'd be just a little bit closer.

So fuck you people. I'm getting married next summer and then no one can keep me away from him. Happy fucking day.

-Is there someone in your life you wish you never met?
Yea.

-Did you sleep well last night?
Very well! I didn't wake up until my alarm, which is rare for me.

-Do you have a common first name?
Not really. It's more common than it used to be, but it's not terribly common

-Who is the one person on your mind right now?
William!

-Describe the last dream you had that you can remember.
I dreamed about being in William's arms again...:) 

-What's the last song you heard? 
So What? - Pink

-Who/What is your favorite cartoon character?
Spongebob!

-What is the toughest decision/choice you ever had to make?
What to study in college.

-Any current family issues?
Well...sort of. My parents aren't especially happy with me right now because I stayed the night with my boyfriend the other night.

-Do you believe that someone can ever be completely satisfied?
ABSOLUTELY! :D

-Who is the last friend you spent time with alone outside of school?
Ashley

-What do you think of your mother?
She's pretty cool, but kind of insane. I love her.

-Your father? 
He is also pretty cool, and kind of insane, but in a different way than my mom. I love him too.

-Your siblings (if there are any)?
I have none.

-How many hours do you spend online a day?
Probably 3-8

-How do you feel about teen relationships?
They are good for teaching you what you don't want and what you might want.

-What about relationships in general?
I think relationships are wonderful, wonderful things!

-Who's room of the opposite sex were you in last? When?
William's room at his brother's house. That was Saturday. :D

-Do you think that people have the power to make their own lives better?
Certainly!

-What are your views on homosexuals in general?
I personally don't think it's right, but I have nothing against these kinds of people. Some of my best friends are homosexuals. I feel they have the right to live anyway they want.

-What kind of person are you? 
I am an optimist and a person who tries to like and get along with everyone. I am intensely loyal to the people and the things that I love. I fall in love quickly, though not often, and once I have been hurt, it takes me a long time to get over it. I forgive easily, but I never forget.

-Do you ever hate yourself?
Sometimes. Less now than before, because I have my Edward to assure me that I am worth it. :wub

-Do you ever hate any of your friend(s)?
No, I don't think so. My friends make me angry from time to time, but I don't hate them.

-What is the most pointless movie that you have ever seen?
Napoleon Dynamite

-Do you think that everybody deserves a second chance?
Depends on the situation. Sometimes yes, most times not.

-Do you and any of your friends have a 'song'? 
Stop! In the Name of Love. XD WHITTY-POO!!!

-Where is your favorite place to be?
In William's arms.

-What's the last movie you watched in theaters?
Wall-E, I think.

-The last movie you watched with a friend?
Made of Honor (but I didn't really "see" the movie, if you get my drift.)

-An inside joke between you and your friend(s)?
I think someone's car alarm is going off. Either that or it's a bird on crack...or maybe speed!

-Who is the most important person in your life right now?
William. Plain and simple.

-Which is more important to you - friends or family?
Both

-Do you feel like nobody understands you?
No. Because I have William. And he understands me perfectly.

-Do you feel that you are loved?
Absolutely. I know that I am loved.

-What is your favorite thing to do when you are bored?
Think, read, write, internet, MSOS

-How are you feeling? 
ECSTATIC!

-What time is it? 
8:28 PM

-Which is worse - smoking, drinking, or drugs?
Drugs

-Is there one person you would seriously kill if you could get away with it?
I don't think so.

-Have you ever had a penpal? 
Yea, but she only wrote me once  

-What is your worst fear?
Losing William, death, failure

-Have you ever kissed someone of the same gender as you?
No.

-Have you ever played with fire?
XD Me=total pyro

-What is the one thing you want most from life?
Love, happiness, children, success

-What is the last scary movie that actually scared you?
The Ring...

-Wallpaper on your cell phone?
William. XD

-Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?
Dad, for like two seconds. Before that it was William!

-Who was your last text/im from?
Seth

-What's your favorite number?
7

-What are you listening to?
Teh TV.

-Do you get along with girls?
Most of the time.

-Last thing you ate?
An AWESOME steak from texas roadhouse

-What was last thing you drank?
Diet Coke.

-Are you happy right now?
VERY VERY much so!

-What's the last thing someone said to you?
Bye. lol.

-Where is your phone?
Next to me on my desk.

-What color is your hair?
Sandy blonde/blonde

-If you could have one thing right now what would it be?
William, here, with me, now.

-Who makes you happiest right now?
William

-What were you doing at midnight tonight?
Sleeping

-What about at eleven?
Getting ready to sleep/texting William

-What's the last thing you thought about?
William and the amazing weekend we shared

-When is your birthday?
September 7th

-How do you feel about your hair right now?
It's ok.

-Where does most of your family live?
Indiana

-Do you think a relationship can last 6 months without cheating?
Absolutely

-What color are your eyes?
Blue/Gray

-What is the one question you get asked a lot?
Why didn't you practice?

-Are you married?
Not yet.

-Is there anyone who doesn't like you?
I'm sure there is.

-Are you mad at someone right now?
Nah.

-Do you want any tattoos or piercings?
Nah.

-Do you believe in love?
More than anything.

-When was the last time you threw up?
Years ago. I don't throw up very often.

-When was the last time you drank?
Never.

-Do you have a lot on your mind right now?
Yea, but nothing that's unmanageable.

-Have you lost friends in the past year?
Yea, but such is life.

-Who is your best girl friend?
Ashley and Balee

-Why did you kiss the last person you kissed?
Because he is my boyfriend and because I love him and because it's amazing and it makes me happy.

-Who have you texted in the last 48 hours?
Seth and William

-The phone rings. What do you say?:
Hey! or Hello? or Shalom?

-Ever had a sleepover with the opposite sex?:
XD Yes.

-Are you mean?:
Occasionally.

-Do you talk about your feelings or hide them?: 
Both, to some extent.

-Happiest moment of 2008 so far?:
This past weekend that I spent with William. W-ow...

-What are you drinking?:
Nothing

-Which of your friends is the easiest to talk to?:
Ashley and Balee and Seth

-Who was the ugliest person you saw today?:
Meh...dunno.

-Last time you had a sleepover?
Friday night/Saturday morning XD

-Latest you stayed up in the past week?:
Erm...I didn't really go to bed Friday night/Saturday morning...XD

-Have you been in a car accident?:
Yes.

-Who's the 1st person on your missed calls list?:
Dad

-Do you care if people hate you for no reason?:
Yes

-Do you have someone of the opposite sex you can tell everything to?
Yes.

-What are you wearing?
My sycamores shirt and my fave jeans.

-Wanting?
William.

-Do you speak another language other than English?
No.

-Who do you hate?
Nobody (though sometimes I really dislike William's mom)

-Orange or apple juice?
Either or.

-Who is one person who never lets you down?
William. He hasn't let me down yet.

-Can you vote in next election?
Yup. Already did.

-When will your next kiss be?
Hopefully Friday. XD

-Do you love someone right now?
Yes.

-Where were you at 2:02 this morning?
In my bed asleep.

-What are you doing for your next birthday?
I don't know. Maybe go to a bar, just because I can.

-Do you tend to rip the paper off water bottles?
Sometimes.

-Have you ever changed clothes in a vehicle?
Yup.

-Ever kissed someone who smokes?
Nah.

-Do you cry easily?
Yes.

-Do you have unlimited texting? 
*sigh* No.

-Last time you cried?
Saturday morning at like 4 AM. I was curled against William with my face pressed into his neck, bawling my eyes out.

-Are you excited about anything?
This weekend!

-Do you have any text messages saved on your phone?
24

-Do you enjoy life?
Thoroughly.

-Do you still talk to the person who hurt you the worst?
Every now and then.

-Do you tend to make things complicated?
I try not to...but I probably do.

-What do you look forward to in the next 3 months?
Seeing William. Christmas. Thanksgiving. BMT Graduation.

-Anything exciting tomorrow?
Nope, not really.

-Are you having a good day today?
Relatively.

-Did you like anyone last summer?:
Yes. XD

Here was the first thread about DB's mom that I made... http://forum.militarysos.com/showthread.php?t=225291

I swear to goodness! This woman never stops!

When I was home last weekend, I went and saw William at work since his mom wouldn't let me come by the house and see him. It all went fine and I didn't have to see Brenda, but I did end up volunteering to work. It was the best of both worlds, in my mind, because I was going to get paid for a full days work and I would get to see William in the meantime.

I ended up getting to see William last night because he went down to play basketball and I stopped by while he was there. Brenda had said no to him going on an actual date, but she let him go to the park, which was fine because that's usually what we end up doing on dates anyway. So we sat and talked and enjoyed outselves for a couple of hours until he had to be home and I was beyond happy because it was the first time in almost a month I had really gotten to spend time with William.

Then today rolled around...and it went better than I could have ever expected. William and I met at work and spent the morning before we clocked in just talking and enjoying ourselves again and then we got to work together some. Then they let us go for a couple of hours before we had to come back and do turndown...so William and I decided that we would go and get lunch at the local pizza joint. So we went and ate and then he said he needed to run home real quick and feed his dogs, so I drove him, because it was kind of senseless for us to go change vehicles. I met William's dad for the first time in the process, btw, and I find him to be a very nice and very easy going man. I liked him.

Anyway, so as we're pulling out of William's driveway, Brenda calls and asks him where he is. He just tells her that he's at home and that he's on his way back to town (he lives in one town and works in another). So I drive him back to town and we decide, since we have a couple of hours to kill still, that we'll go to a little park and sit for a while and enjoy each other's company some more.

Well...while we're there (snuggled up quite wonderfully on a picnic bench, might I add), Brenda calls again and asks him where he is. He tells her he's back in the town we work in and she wonders how he got there since his truck was still at work...so he tells her that he is with me and then he tells her that we went to eat and that I am the one that drove him home. And she hangs up on him... So William knows that she is ROYALLY PISSED now. So we go ahead and stay at the park since she's already mad anyway and then go back to work when it's time.

So we walk into the housekeeping office and Brenda is sitting at the desk and she gives him the look of death and I know, right then, that she's got it in for both me and him. She is beyond pissed off now. She is livid.

So we spend the rest of the evening working, with her shooting us death stares everytime she gets the chance and then, finally, at long last, it is time for me to clock out. So I go downstairs and swipe my card and then I go to William's locker to get my keys...only to realize that he's locked his locker on me. So I was sitting there waiting for him to come back downstairs and Brenda walks by and asks me why I'm not home yet (in a rather cold evil voice, might I add) and I said, "I have to wait for William to come back down." Her: "No you don't. Just go home." Me: "Yes I do. My stuff is in his locker." She then proceeds to throw me the most distasteful look I've ever seen anyone give me and marches around the corner with her nose in the air.

I just don't understand why that woman has it in for me. I mean...I'm not trying to drag her son off into the woods and seduce him or something. I'm his girlfriend. I love him. I care about him. Sometimes... I think I might want to spend the rest of my life with him...and she acts like I'm just a piece of crap that's stuck to his shoe. I can understand her being a little protective of him. He is the youngest of her four kids, after all, and I can understand that she wants to keep him out of trouble and yadda yadda...but COME ON! He's 18 years old! He can make decisions for himself and he doens't have to tell her where he is EVERY second of the day.

I'm just so tired of her shit and I just want to smack her sometimes.